Me: CHICKEN!
Guy: ....
Me: Chicken wings should be on a stick. We could call it "Stickin' Wings".
Guy: Unbelievable.
Profanasaurus Text
Wednesday, May 9, 2012
Friday, April 6, 2012
Colonial Times
Me: Why the hell would I want to go to Williamsburg? So you can sell me?
Guy: I don't think the Hipsters are that bad, hon.
Guy: I don't think the Hipsters are that bad, hon.
Saturday, March 3, 2012
Allegory?
Me: *reading a YA novel* Oh, no! This is an allegory.
Guy: That's the one that stays in the water.
*FYI- He didn't misunderstand me, he meant a pun on alligator.
Guy: That's the one that stays in the water.
*FYI- He didn't misunderstand me, he meant a pun on alligator.
Monday, February 20, 2012
Sauerkraut and Miso Soup
Guy: I'm going to have a restaurant with just sauerkraut and miso soup.
Me: You're gonna have a lot of gassy people coming out of there.
Guy: I'm gonna call it Miso Sauer.
Me: You're gonna have a lot of gassy people coming out of there.
Guy: I'm gonna call it Miso Sauer.
Sunday, February 19, 2012
Some Pig
Me: Wait, so Asian people watch 'Portlandia'?
Guy: I watch 'Portlandia'.
Me: You're a special kind of Asian.
Guy: Am I like Wilbur the Pig? He's a special pig.
Me: That's some pig.
*A McDonald's chicken commercial has solely Asian folk enjoying chicken. Yeah.
Guy: I watch 'Portlandia'.
Me: You're a special kind of Asian.
Guy: Am I like Wilbur the Pig? He's a special pig.
Me: That's some pig.
*A McDonald's chicken commercial has solely Asian folk enjoying chicken. Yeah.
Wednesday, February 15, 2012
Thursday, February 9, 2012
Black Ice
Guy: Oh no, black ice. Black ice is the worst of the bunch.
Me: That's racist.
Guy: Black ice don't give a fuck. Streets till it die.
Me: That's racist.
Guy: Black ice don't give a fuck. Streets till it die.
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