Monday, February 20, 2012

Sauerkraut and Miso Soup

Guy: I'm going to have a restaurant with just sauerkraut and miso soup.
Me: You're gonna have a lot of gassy people coming out of there.
Guy: I'm gonna call it Miso Sauer.

Sunday, February 19, 2012

Some Pig

Me: Wait, so Asian people watch 'Portlandia'?
Guy: I watch 'Portlandia'.
Me: You're a special kind of Asian.
Guy: Am I like Wilbur the Pig? He's a special pig.
Me: That's some pig.

*A McDonald's chicken commercial has solely Asian folk enjoying chicken. Yeah.

Wednesday, February 15, 2012

Me: I can't believe it's called 'That's My Jam'.
Guy: That's my Jelly was already taken.

Thursday, February 9, 2012

Black Ice

Guy: Oh no, black ice. Black ice is the worst of the bunch.
Me: That's racist.
Guy: Black ice don't give a fuck. Streets till it die.

Sunday, February 5, 2012

Defiant Birds

*We were watching Rio*
Guy: Are they doing The Defiant Ones? Which one is Sidney Poitier?
Me, disgustedly: He's not a bird.